


Happily Ever After

by Parselmouth_bloodtraitor



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: 3x23, Angst, Canon Compliant, Derek Has Issues, F/M, Flashbacks, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Hale Family Feels, M/M, Multi, Nemeton, Nogitsune, Non-Linear Narrative, Suicidal Thoughts, major grief, spoilers for the death, up until the latest episode that is, yep im revisiting flashbacks of kate and paige
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-18
Updated: 2014-03-18
Packaged: 2018-01-16 05:38:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1334071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parselmouth_bloodtraitor/pseuds/Parselmouth_bloodtraitor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They all understand now that it is not only a friend who dies, but also a piece of you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happily Ever After

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the trailer for next week, multiple quotes, and my anger over Allison's death.
> 
> Quotes that inspired this story are written in the end notes.

20.

They all understand now that it is not a friend who dies, but also a piece of you.

 

1.

He is last to arrive at the battle, and by the time he gets there the battle is already done.

No one is moving, doesn't look like anyone has moved in a very long time, and Derek has the sudden urge to escape what tragedy he is about to walk into. That kind of silence can be only produced by one thing; grief. For a brief moment, he believes that it might be Stiles, but the scent of his blood is not in the air. He doesn't let himself be relieved though, because it is obvious that someone died here and Allison and Isaac are bleeding.

No, actually, he finds out as he steps into the scene of the battle, Allison  _was_  bleeding.

 

 4.

"It's so unfair!" Scott says brokenly, and Derek relates.

(He cried for days, weeks, months,  _years_ after Paige died. Saw her body everywhere he looked and saw her eyes everytime he closed his. He dreamt of blood on his hands and woke with tears in his eyes. He refused to look in a mirror for a long time, didn't want to see his blue eyes.)

(They promised each other they would get married. A wedding at sunset where they dance under the stars as they appeared and could pretend that they were the only two people in the world. They promised each other they were going to have a happily ever after, but they didn't, and now Scott can't have that either.)

He wants to shout with Scott, wants to scream and yell and declare how unfair everything is. They were both young, both way too young to experience the death of their first love in their arms. He wants to mourn Paige while Scott mourns Allison, wants to cry and grieve all over again. Wants to tell Scott that Allison should have lived longer, that they should have broken up a few more times and dated a billion times more; that they should have settled down and had kids and a semi-normal that Scott craved at the beginning but now looked at as an impossible dream. Fate is cruel, but it will be okay, Scott, it will be okay eventually.

All he ends up saying is "I know."

 

2.

He wants to say something to all of them, wants to break the silence and motivate everyone, wants to turn the tragedy into something beautiful, but he doesn't know what to say, doesn't know how to say it.

"The dead cannot cry out for justice. It is the job of the living to do so for them. Allison died fighting for what she believed in, and it is our job to finish what she fought for." He appreciates Kira so much at that moment, with her ability to smile in trouble and gather strength from distress. She'll be good for Scott, but not now, not for a long time.

 

5.

Derek has no idea what do from here, doesn't have any plan. He's an adult, he should be able to lead these teenagers successfully, but he knows how it ended up last time he tried to be a leader, an alpha. He came back to Beacon Hills to make sure nothing like that ever happens again, but these teenagers need a course of action now, need a leader now.

 

3.

Scott looks too broken to be a proper alpha now, to come up with a plan to get rid of the nogistune and keep Stiles safe. But then again, everyone looks the same way; distraught, confused, broken. Everyone needs to take time that they don't have, time to recoup, to mourn, to grieve. They all need to bemoan their friend. Scott needs to lament his first love, needs to mend his broken heart over the girl he thought would always end up with.

 

7.

No is one emotionally able to be a leader right now, so Derek can take that place as leader, right? He's learned from his past mistakes; he can come up with a proper plan this time that won't end tragically. He can do this. He has to do this. He has to protect the others.

 

11.

"Drive faster!" he shouts through clenched teeth, his voice conveying the threat that would follow upon denying his request.

"I'm going as fast as I can!" Stiles shouts back, glaring at him despite the glowing eyes Derek was flashing at him, his eyes unwavering.

(Laura used to look at him like that. Whenever he made a snarky comment that she disapproved of but secretly found hilarious, or when things weren't as nice and they were fighting and shouting and hunters were on their asses and they had to run run  _run_   _heaven forbid if someone fell behind._ _)_

"Well try!" Derek yells because if the jeep doesn't go any faster than they are definitely done for.

"Gee thanks, I never thought of that!" Stiles sarcasm doesn't go far with Derek though, because all he smells is fear and panic and Derek knows that Stiles needs to get out of this now, just as he should of when this first started.

(He remembers when he first was able to associate emotions to smell. His family always retained the same smell with one another, a smell that Derek can only identify as home now.)

(Stiles' smell kind of reminds him of it actually.)

 

6.

"The nogistune killed her," Chris says as he loads his gun. Derek flinches as each round of ammo fills the gun, and he is at a loss for words to say.

(He understands this grief, this thirst for vengeance. He once felt it for Chris Argent himself, for the Argents in general. He wanted nothing more than to destroy the Argent family for what Kate did to him, but he knows now that it was misaimed anger.)

"But Stiles didn't. Stiles is not your enemy."  _And we are not enemies anymore either, so please listen to me._  "Your daughter died fighting to protect him. Do not kill what she died for."

Chris seems to visibly deflate under his words, and Derek grasps his shoulder lest he collapse on his own feet. He feels the need to take away some of his pain with the touch, but there is no pain to take from him, no physical pain that is. The man has lost his family, lost all the life that used to make up his home, and Derek feels for him.

"She died, and I wasn't even there for her." He's whispering, like talking is battle that he cannot win, like mentioning Allison's name pains him. He looks at Derek with sunken eyes and a sadness that was not there before.

(Derek recognizes that look; he saw it plenty of times in the mirror before.)

 

12.

Derek doesn't know what to say so he just growls and looks out behind them. There is nothing there, but he knows that the nogistune is coming after them, and he knows it will be on the car in less than a minute; he's sure Stiles knows too judging from the way his heartbeat just picked up even more.

(His parent's heartbeats always rose around one another, just as they would smile and laugh even more than before. As a child, he though that was all there was to love.)

(Kate's heartbeat never rose around him, but there was still smiling and laughing and Derek thought that maybe that was enough.)

"Derek..." Stiles doesn't say anything more but then again he doesn't really have to - Derek hears it all. He hears that silent question in his words beneath all the worry.  _What are we going to do?_

(He learned to pick up on that from his parents. He always heard the silent threat of being grounded when his father growled his name. The silent sympathy from his mother when his eyes turned blue. The silent concern from Laura when he started seeing an older girl. He thought he heard the silent promises of love from that same girl, but he now knows what was left unsaid with Kate was meant to be that way.)

"Keep driving. Don't stop." Derek keeps his voice steady, trying to see if he can calm Stiles with words alone.

(Laura used to do the same with him.)

(Then again, it never really worked well enough to calm him down, and it seems to be the same with Stiles.)

"'Don't stop?' What, did you think I was planning on that?"

 

9.

If the only way to stop Stiles from sacrificing himself is to surrender his own life, then so be it.

 

13.

Stiles looks at him then, with a look that could rival Derek's own, but suddenly his face changes and he realizes what Derek's plan is without even needing to ask him.

(Sometimes he wonders if something on his face gives him away. His entire family was able to do that too, even the betas in his pack were able to. He hopes Scott is better at it than he was.)

(Kate could do it too, but he can't be sure if his plans with her were really his own or is he was being brainwashed into thinking they were.)

"Oh no, you are not going out there. You are not going to get yourself killed." His tone of voice left no room for argument, and even though his eyes are focused on the road there's a new tension in his shoulders that speak volumes about his feelings towards the plan.

(His mother used that voice. It's the voice of an alpha, commanding and powerful, but Derek just thinks that's how moms spoke to their children.)

(He tried to use that voice when he had a pack, but he wasn't as successful, he never was.)

"That's not your decision to make, Stiles. Just stay in here and keep driving." His hand is already on the door, ready to roll out and fight, fight for his life, fight for Stiles' life.

"But..." Stiles's starts, before swallowing and continuing, "you promised me."

 

 8.

"You to have to promise me," Stiles starts, and he looks so weak and smells like death that Derek cannot think of a reason for why he would say no to him, "that you will not let anyone else get hurt because of me."

"You're not the one hurting people." It's automatic, and phrases like  _don't be guilty, it's not your fault_ dance around in his mind.

(Phrases like his mother told him after he killed Paige. Phrases like his mother told him after he spoke to her a few months ago about the fire.)

"But it's still my body. It is still me. Why doesn't anyone understand that?"

"It's not you. It's the nogistune. And we will find a way to destroy that creature."

"And if the only way to kill the nogistune is to kill me as well?" He pauses and looks Derek dead in the eye. "Then do it."

Derek doesn't know what to say. All he wants is to comfort him, convince him that none of this is his fault, tell him that everyone still loves him and this disaster will never change that. But all he says is "no" and he doesn't think that really captured what he was feeling, but it would have to do for now.

"Why not?" Stiles looks so exasperated, so frustrated, so tired, but Derek refuses to let it change his mind. He will not be an accomplice in someone else's death, not again. "Allison's blood is on my hands," he whispers, "I don't want another's to be too."

Derek nearly looks down at his hands then, remembering all the people he maimed and hurt and killed in the past.

(He thought things like this when he was in New York. Thoughts of suicide and death. He had killed so many that were dear to him, and he thought that maybe it would just be better if he killed himself along with them. Thought it would bring balance back to the world, bring justice to what he had done, if he did.)

(Laura reminded him everyday that he wasn't his fault, but he never believed her, but he also never attempted to kill himself either, so maybe what she said did have an effect on him after all.)

"Your death wish will not compensate for Allison's death." He sounds so brash, so rough, but he doesn't know how else to sound anymore. "Instead, you should try to redeem yourself."

Stiles' eyes dart to the floor. "How?"

Derek doesn't know how to inspire Stiles, can hardly keep the human alive sometimes, but he knows someone who can. "Scott's always been about one thing: saving his friends. He will do anything and everything to save the people he cares about. You want redemption? Stand and fight."  _And don't die, please, for me._ He doesn't add that part though. That's a conversation for another time, when the nogistune is defeated and Allison is mourned and all of this is over.

"Just come with me, we're going on a ride. I have plan."

 

14.

"I won't let you," Stiles says, and he sounds ready to cry. He grabs Derek's arm, and as much as Derek wants to stay, he shakes it off anyway. 

"Stiles..." but before he can finish his statement, Stiles slams on the breaks.

"No, no no no, you are not going out there alone. No, if you're going to fight, then I am too." Stiles says, more like demands, and gets out of the car before Derek can kill him for saying something so stupidly brave. Stiles grabs his bat from the backseat, and shouts "come on nogistune, we're waiting!"

 

18.

Lydia convinces them all that the nemeton should be used as a burial spot. "If one's sacrifice is what gave the nemeton power again, maybe their death will be able to change that power to be used for good."

 

15.

The nogistune appears behind Stiles as soon as it is called, and Derek leaps out of the car to attack it, but Stiles tries first by hitting it in the arm. The nogistune doesn't react, but Stiles suddenly shouts in pain and the bat falls to the ground.

"You can't kill me, Stiles. Not without killing yourself."

Stiles doesn't say anything, but instead pulls out a gun. "Stiles, what..." Derek starts, but he seems unable to finish his sentence. His throat has closed up on him and he's not sure what he was going to say but it's never going to be said now.

"It's my dad's gun," Stiles says, cold and aloof. "I brought it in case we needed it." He raised the gun to aim at the nogistune. "And I think that we need it now."

"Stiles, don't." But Derek isn't the one who said it, it's Scott, who seems to have shown up with Isaac, Lydia, and Kira, and he wishes that he showed up sooner, before the nogistune came. "Please. Too many have died already."

"Yeah," Stiles agrees, resigned. "And after this, no one else will."

Derek thinks that he momentarily forget how to breathe when Stiles pulled the trigger.

 

10.

"Scott, I have a plan. Meet up with Stiles and me as soon as possible." Derek hangs up the phone, and climbs into Stiles' jeep. Best that they're there to stop Stiles from doing something stupid when Derek enacts his plan.

 

 

16.

Stiles collapses as soon as the nogistune does, blood blooming on his chest. Everything seems to be moving slower than usual, and Derek can't seem to rush to Stiles quick enough. Lydia gets there first, and cradles him in her arms.

He dies in Lydia's arms, in the arms of his first love, and as poetic as it is, Derek still selfishly wants to hold him in his own. Wants to finally tell him all those things he had been keeping to himself, all those things he kept pushing off to another day. He speaks, whispers of love and happiness and joy that makes Derek want to cry. "Now no one else can get hurt because of me," he says, and no one says anything because they're all busy crying. And Derek wants to tell him that he's the human, he was the one they were supposed to protect, not the one causing all this chaos.

Stiles doesn't say anything else, never does, and the silence seems deafening without Stiles' constant chatter. And Derek wants to say so much more, but he can't, he can't.

 

19.

No one asks how Lydia knows that; they know that the screaming voices must have told her about the nemeton, and no one wants to know if Allison's and Stiles' screams can still be heard.

Derek believes that Stiles and Allison were strong, are strong, and that if anyone could change the nemeton's power it would be them. They would be able to draw in kind creatures to Beacon Hills, and ward of the monsters that have been plaguing the town. They'll meld with the tree, meld with nature itself, and from their rotting bodies will come flowers. Some sort of life should still be able to come from them.

Derek grunts and nods his head. Speaking is too hard now, anyway.

 

17.

 And he wants to yell at the universe, wants to yell at fate  _Why can no get a happily ever after?_

**Author's Note:**

> A man who won't die for something is not fit to live - Martin Luther King Jr
> 
> Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them. - George Eliot
> 
> It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived. - George S Patton
> 
> A friend who dies, it's something of you who dies. - Gustave Flaubert
> 
> The dead cannot cry out for justice. It is a duty of the living to do so for them. - Lois McMaster Bujold
> 
> From my rotting body, flowers shall grow and I am in them and that is eternity. -Edvard Munch
> 
> The timing of death, like the ending of a story, gives a changed meaning to what preceded it. - Mary Catherine Bateson
> 
> Love and death are the two great hinges on which all human sympathies turn. - B R Hayden
> 
> I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. 'Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm and whose conscience approves their conduct will pursue their principles unto death. - Leonardo da Vinci


End file.
